Katie Couric: My guest today is a notable nobody from Cincinnati, OH. Please welcome Mr. EZ Cheese. (thunderous applause).
EZ Cheese: Thank you for having me, Katie.
KC: So, Mr. Cheese...
EZ: Please, call me EZ.
KC: OK EZ, how was your recent "diplomatic visit" to Philadelphia.
EZ: It was wonderful, very good beer, cheeses steaks and great company.
KC: So did you get laid?
KC: Why not? Wasn't on your agenda.
EZ: Nah, besides I have a hot date with Maria tonight. I am patient and certainly not a player.
EZ: Hardly. I am still cheating here, remember?
KC: Point taken.
EZ: Katie, I may cheat, but I have never had any ambitions to be a "belt notcher," so to speak.
KC: I can respect that. So, tell us about what happened with Maria on Wednesday night in the computer lab.
EZ: Uh, isn't this a family program?
KC: Who cares? I wanna hear something hot. You aren't all that interesting otherwise.
EZ: Gee thanks. Well I went down to the computer lab to email someone and ended up running into her again.
KC: Ha, you went down to email someone? Let's be honest here; you went to see her, didn't you?
EZ: Well, we were in the lab by ourselves when she came over and sat on my lap, grinding her ass on my hard on.
KC: Why did you have a hard on?
EZ: Looking at her and writing a naughty email. But, yeah...she was dry humping me in the lab.
KC: Oh my.
EZ: I know, I know. After a minute, unfortunately, someone walked in and she jumped off my lap into the chair next to me. The guy sat in the front and we were in the back. She started rubbing my head through my jeans until a little wet spot appeared. My breathing was getting shallow.
KC: What happened next?
EZ: She took my dick out.
KC: In the computer lab?
EZ: In the fucking computer lab.
KC: Wow, she is feisty.
EZ: See why I like her?
KC: I do. Please continue. What happened next?
EZ: Well, uh...she gave me head. I was trying to keep quiet, thank God the guy in the front had headphones on. I asked her to go to the bathroom with me, she said she couldn't leave. She also said that she liked this better.
KC: Believe me, we do too.
EZ: I had about the most intense orgasm I have had in a few weeks. I was so worked up it was unbelievable, especially with the having to be quiet part. Completely exhilarating.
KC: Sounds like it.
EZ: So then she took me out of her mouth, kissed the tip, kissed my forehead, said something naughty in my ear and went back to her desk. She just sat there watching me catch my breath, occasionally giggling.
KC: So, what did she say in your ear?
EZ: Katie, my dear, that is a secret.
KC: There is more going on with this woman than you are letting on, isn't there?
EZ: I might be holding back just a little bit of info from you.
KC: What information might that be?
EZ: Wait and see.
KC: Ok, fair enough. Enjoy your date tonight and thank you so much for coming on the show today.
EZ: It was my pleasure, Katie.