Twofer

Last night I wrote two things that I have decided that I am going to post. On account of my lack of desire (and lack of money) I stayed home and did not go out. I also got locked out of my apartment so I had a lot of time to think. I was only going to post one of the two now and save the other for another time. I have, however, decided that since I like you guys I will give you both. So without further adieu...