Monday, February 02, 2009

Clarity (Part Two)

The feeling comes almost instantaneously. The sensation radiates in your brain, washing out the clutter as a wave erases footprints from the sand. There is never such a moment of clarity as the one gained in the tenderness of a touch. All the insignificant worries of the day disappear; the mind is simple and focused. Pleasure floods the brain, senses heighten and eyes focus, no worries about the past or future plague you. Nerves spark as the body responds to the warmth of the flesh, melting away your cares. Time stands still as you surrender to her.

I have never experienced such a feeling of simplicity.

I remember what it feels like to have her near. The smell of her perfume hangs so vividly in my mind, leaving me glimpses of her. She faced away from me, laying on her side, as I traced the subtle changes in her figure. I remember her smile greeting me as she turned into my chest; she raises her hand to my face.


I remember sound becoming clear and my vision sharpening as I felt myself slip away. Decisions were simple. Kiss. Grasp. Suck. Bite. I thought of nothing. The sensation in my muscles took over as body pacified mind. Snapshots of the hunger in her arms as we tangled under the blankets still my mind. I thought not of pain nor of fear, my brain focused on the one before me.


The memories never accurately describe the feeling, never capture the power. Her eyes stare back up at me, piercing into me. She pulls me down and whispers to me, I bury myself in her chest, still as one. We lay in silence, time passes, the moment gains control of the mind.

Alive like I had never been. I could feel my heart beating and my eyes growing heavy as we lay there smiling. Fear and worry held so much power over me, I was paralyzed, she saw past that...taking me in spite of the risk.

The same feeling surges through my body every time she is near…calm. There is an undeniable urge for silence, a time to stop the insanity in both our heads. No thoughts of if it can work, how will we change or what does this mean…just the simple, burning ache for touch. So I lay there in silence, the sensation still clings to my skin where her fingers once moved. It is so much more than anything else on earth.

The next day I wake up to her asleep next to me, I watch her so peaceful, chest rising and falling. The euphoria is still fresh in my brain and the worries of the normal day remain distant, kept at bay. Something changes in my brain; as if the burden never existed. With her there is no slate to be erased; no list of grievances, no grudge is a cornerstone. It is beyond good, I know now that I need it, time and again.

There is no clarity like that which waits in her arms. The rush of blood from her touch and the sudden urge to have her dominate my waking life. The taste of her skin as she clings to mine…primal, instinctive and cohesive, but most importantly, liberating. Everything washes away; she digs through the layers and defenses and takes what is hers. Simple, clear and lucid. We are humanity in its rawest form.

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