Blackout

The alarm sounded like a fucking jet engine taking off next to my bed. There are just some days when you shouldn't even wake up. The text messages from the night before were my only clue as to what happened. Just as I suspected, nothing good was said.

Sitting here now I wonder what the fuck was I thinking. Now it seems everyone is pissed off at me and in no short order making it known that I need to grow up, that I am a moron, that I was a mess, that there was no reason to drink that much. YES I GET IT.

Sometimes I guess I just see how far I have gotten and I feel like I need to destroy all my progress with some form of amber liquid. I don't remember anything, my stomach feels like it is turning over and everyone is pissed off at me. I don't even know why I'm wasting my fucking time writing this. I don't need any more reminders of how fucking stupid I am.

I see it on a daily basis.